love and oranges

From Mom:

I am honored by the fact that Brenda has invited me to write a guest entry about my experience so far while visiting her here in Cambodia.

I went through a dozen different titles for this entry, before I decided on this one. Perhaps if I give you the other options, you may get a tiny idea of how things are here. The other titles were:

You expect me to do WHAT in the bathroom?

No traffic laws-so what!?!?!

Do I really have to eat all that rice?

Why are all those people staring at me?

$5 for a new work blouse?

Why is that cow tied up behind the house?

Why do I have to wait to finish eating before they bring my coffee?

So for now, I will focus on the beautiful relationships Brenda has formed here…”

The first 21/2 days on this trip, we spent in Battambang, the provincial town about 17km from her village. The hotel people all knew Brenda and seemed genuinely happy to see her. Of course she introduced me and I heard the same statement that I would hear countless times, “You have the same face”, “You look so young”. The Khmer people are just about obsessed with age and appearance- one of the many contradictions I have noticed so far.

Another special person I met is Anna, an American woman living in Battambang and owner of Café Eden. Brenda discovered this haven of ‘western’ food, art and companionship. She has brought many other PCV’s there and it has become an oasis of English, recognizable food and relaxation.

At this point I must share that my respect for all the volunteers has grown exponentially. These are very special people who sacrifice all that is familiar in terms of culture, language, attitudes, food, hygiene, safety, health, clothing and work ethics to fulfill a commitment and manifest a dream of accomplishment on a global scale.  I do not have the skill to express how awestruck I am.

In the local market we met the seamstresses who Brenda frequents. They too expressed joy at seeing Brenda and respected her by greeting me in a traditional manner (hands in prayer position).  After our market adventures, Brenda took me to meet the wife of her frequent driver. She treated us with sugar cane water. I was reluctant to even try this drink, thinking it would be terribly sweet and sticky-it was wonderful, refreshing with an orange flavor.

Finally it was time to meet with Brenda’s family and head out to site.

As we waited in the hotel lobby, they rushed in. Brenda’s host parents and of course little Lia Pea. Pea ran over to Brenda and gave her a big hug, then she hugged me and I was immediately in love with this child. The parents also greeted Brenda with an abundance of affection and great respect to me. It was as if we were engulfed in a cloud of love. We all made our way to the car, some sort of 4-door Toyota sedan, and loaded all our luggage.

Pea-who must weigh all of 45 pounds stood in the car most of the way. She climbed from front to back at will and seatbelts were tucked away under a seat cover. At the mother’s direction, the dad stopped at various stalls along the perimeter of the market as the mother purchased various items, eggs, bread, fried chicken heads and so on. The mom being in charge and dad driving the car, had a ring of cultural familiarity, but that is where the familiar experience ended.

Dad’s business is selling oranges and so each meal one is expected to eat at least one orange and say it is the sweetest orange ever eaten. Truth be told, they are hardly sweet, full of pits and eaten by sucking the juice out of a half that has been peeled (by the mother before she drops it into your bowl). The mother would not allow me or Brenda help with any of the chores so we could not contribute ideas etc. in terms of food prep.

Dinner was served on a mat on the floor after our “shower” in our pajamas. This mat is rolled out and put away specifically for mealtime. We all sat on the floor; legs crossed and were given a bowl, a plate and a spoon. The mom placed a large amount of rice in the bowl, and then various other dishes, (some had taken hours to prepare) are placed in bowls on the mat. The idea is to spoon bite size amounts of the other foods onto the rice and eat other food together with the rice. There is no worry about hands in the communal bowls or personal spoons  (double dipping is the way to go here!). The first night, the mom prepared chicken curry, which is one of Brenda’s favorites. When one is done with a small part that contains inedible bones, those bones are simply placed on the mat to be collected later and given to the kitten. This special dish was prepared in honor of my visit and a very special and expensive dish to prepare. There were 8 additional guests to the dinner that night. All were trying out the few English words they knew, and staring at me. Brenda was speaking and laughing with these wonderful warm people and was really very much a part of the evening.

I hope this provided a tiny view of the world Brenda is living in right now. Truly an adventure and accomplishment of a lifetime!